Fear of 37

I've been seeing 37 everyday since I was 23 and I got shivers through me the first time I saw it. I have always known it was a message but what it means, I just don't really know. But fear keeps interfering and I can only hope it's not intuition! I fear that I might die when I'm 37. But that only gives me a few short years left now. But I see it at least 12 times a day!! Sometimes more!!! I feel like there should be a name on the phobias list specifically for those who fear this number but as far as I know, there's no known name specifically for this fear. But I partly don't even leave the house because of my fear of 37. I don't get on the number 37 bus. And if I do live to survive a year of having lived 37 years, I won't be calling myself "age 37" but 36a or "36 and 1" and I actually dread this because it will become more apparent that I fear the number 37. Maybe I could pass it off as insecurity in my creeping in old age but 30s is still a bit young to start feeling insecure about age. Even laughable these days. So I just don't know how I'm going to handle it. And my depression doesn't help. Sometimes I just spend so much time agonising over this that I get sick and just want to die. I don't actively seek to harm myself but I go to sleep at night hoping that it's the last time and that I won't wake up. Anyone else anything like this???

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